i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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