i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
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Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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