I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
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I need you to use more vowels.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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