I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize