What a fucking waste of an outfit
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize