Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I got inside last night via doggy door
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize