Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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