Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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