I want to have your abortion
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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