i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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