that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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