I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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