That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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