I like to think it a success when the cops are called
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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