tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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