You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
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I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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