i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize