He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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