im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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