gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
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You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
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Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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