lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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