She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
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Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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