last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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