So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
His hands were made for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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