She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
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Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
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You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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