I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize