You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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