the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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