i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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