Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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