found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
please come you make the beer taste better
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
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Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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