Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize