a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize