I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
this just has baby written all over it
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize