i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize