we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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