i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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