I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." ๐ ๐๐ท
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but donโt like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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