i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize