is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize