Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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