Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
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Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
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You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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