I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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