The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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