Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize