did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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