Have you finally orgasmed yet?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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