He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize