Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize