who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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